Quick Write~Beekeeper

Quick Write Number One - The Beekeeper

For the next two weeks we are going to work on ‘Quick Writes.’  This is where you are given something to write about (a writing prompt) and you only have 10mins to write as much as possible using this writing prompt.

For our writing prompts we will use either images or short videos.

The purpose of this is to practise writing fluently.

When we look at our writing prompt we will have about 10-15 mins to discuss it and brainstorm some ideas and vocabulary.   

Our learning goals are to:

-write a description, using powerful words and phrases

-include some Te Reo Māori

-carefully check that our sentences make sense and have correct punctuation and spelling.

When we are writing we need to think about…

1. What do I want my reader to see?

2) What do I want my reader to hear?

3) What do I want my reader to smell?

Tips:

-look closely at the picture or video

-think about the three key questions and the learning goals

-give yourself time to plan and write

Do your writing here

It was a warm spring morning, and as I walked up to the beehive  I smelt the sweet smell of honey. As I carefully lifted up the frame my hands started shaking and, the bees started buzzing. I started pulling off bits of honeycomb  till it was all gone. I put the frame back into hive and the bees clung onto the frame like magnets.😊😁

Robot Rampage Work

In our class this term we have been learning about narrative writing. Here is my robot rampage story.

Narrative Writing Term 3 2017

Click on the link below to watch the story starter for this week.

http://success-for-boys.tki.org.nz/Teaching-learning-resources/Story-Starters/Runaway-Robot-Rampage

Story Starter = Robot Rampage

Your Name:Lily

Story starter: Every weekend there was one job Indi hated doing cleaning her room. She’d rather be building her latest robot invention in the shed, That's it!  What if Indi could build a robot who could clean her room.

WALT: write a narrative that entertains or tells a story about people,places or events.
S.C:
Our Story will...
-have a title that captures our reader's interest
-Have an orientation/beginning that has a hook and establishes the setting and characters.
-Have a complication/problem that needs to be solved
-Have a conclusion where the problem is solved.
-Use interesting language, words, adjectives, language features such as similes, onomatopoeia
-plan our story so we know what to write about
-proof-read and edit
-make sure our sentences make sense
-use a range of punctuation
-Use some Te Reo Māori words

My two goals are: Use paragraphs, introduce the characters at the start.

Planning

Title:	The Best Inventer Ever!
Orientation/Beginning/Hook Characters	Indi the inventor, Motion the room cleaner Papa Indi’s dad who only speaks maori but understands english.
Complication/Problem	Motion malfunctions and trashes Indi’s room.
Conclusion - How does the problem get solved?	Indi Brakes motion and fixes her again, only this time she works and everyone in town wants to rent motion  therefore Indi gets rich.
Language Simile (He was as tall as a giraffe/ She was like a wild, angry gorilla that had been released from its cage!) Onomatopoeia(sound words) Interesting Adjectives (describing words) Te Reo Māori.	Motion is as clean as a rainwater Bang Clunk  squeak Kia ora

Write Your Story Here

The Best Inventer Ever

Every weekend there was one job Indi hated doing cleaning her room. She’d rather be building her latest robot invention in the shed, That's it!  What if Indi could build a robot who could clean her room! That day Indi went to her shed and found these things an old vacuum cleaner, rope, a new laundry basket, and old metal shapes to make the body.

That Friday night she stayed up all night building her robot. BANG, CLANK, CRASH these sounds were as loud as a gorilla all night! The next day her robot was built! Her father had been wondering where she was all night. When she came in her dad said “Kia ora Kei hea koe i te po katoa?”(Hello, where have you been all night?) “Well I was out in the shed,” “He pai.” (that’s ok) Indi went into the shed and grabbed her robot. She walked back into the house and went to her room and she grabbed her remote and said, “Your name is Motion.”

She pushed start on her remote and Motion burst into life! Indi  thought Motion was as clean as rainwater Indi no longer had to clean her room for weeks until….

One day when Indi came home from school her Papa said “He tino paru to rūma!” (Your room is a mess what happened?) Indi ran to her room as quick as she could, she opened the door and found Motion trashing her room with old clothes and rubbish from the bin! Indi tried pushing the off button on the remote but it wouldn’t work! Indi decided to brake Motion and fix him again. She finally stopped Motion and she broke him apart. She found out what happened after 3 hours of trying to figure out what had happened, she had overworked Motion! Indi Tried to fix Motion twice but Motion would not stop making a mess!

Indi tried once more and Motion worked! Motion was up and running again Motion cleaned up all of the mess he had made. Plus Motion got Indi's dad to speak english! Indi made a business out of Motion, and charged $20 an hour, and that worked! By the time she worked for two years she had reached a Million dollars!

How did you go?

What do you think you did well?  

Adding Paragraphs.

What could you work on next time?

Adding more topic specific words.

Teacher Feedback:

Kia ora Lily

I really enjoyed reading your story.  It was great to see you achieving your goals of using paragraphs and introducing your characters at the start.

I thought you used some interesting language, good punctuation and made the story entertaining for the reader.

Your next step it to read your work carefully as there are still a few full stops missing.

A great story Lily. Ka pai tō mahi tuhituhi.

My Elections Work

The last two week our class has been learning about the 2017 General Elections. We had to make our own politcal parties, here is my work.

My Dream Action Plan

We have been working on thinking about dreams we have that we would like to achieve. We wrote up a 'dream plan.' Here is my plan for my dream.


🕺💃🙂

This action plan is to help me achieve:

My Dream for myself: To be a professional dancer

My Dream for New Zealand: For all animals and people to have a house and to have food.

Why is this dream important to me? This is Important to me because dancing is a key thing in my life.

Who within my family, friends or community can I ask for support or advice to achieve my dream?

I can ask my dance teacher.

Other dances.

Mum and Dad

Nan

In order to achieve my dream I will need the following skills and knowledge

1.Go to lots of dance classes.

2.Go stretching classes.

3.Practice lots and lots.

4.Have a good memory.

5.Not have stiff movements.

When do I want to achieve my dream by?

When im 25

What are some things that might go wrong and how will I fix them?

I might forget my dance and my face will stop smiling.

The first five steps I need to take to turn my dream into reality are:

1.Be confident.

2.Keep smiling.

3.Learn lots of tricks.

4.You need to fail to learn.

5.Try and try again.

Maths Place Value

We are learning to...

Recognise how many tens and hundreds are in numbers.


Here is my work

Maui Legends

As part of Matariki we re-told the legends of Maui. We then retold a legend and created artwork. Below is my work.

🌞How Maui Captured the Sun🌞

One day Maui woke up  thinking that he would capture the sun tomorrow so he got up and he went to his brothers houses and woke them up. They all agreed that the days were way to slow and they wanted longer days. So Maui and his brothers  were all scared but they had the courage to do it so they all agreed to collect flax and Maui got the magic spell right so the flax would be stronger with magic.

They plaited all of the flax  and made lots of ropes, when Maui came back from getting the spell right they  were all waiting, when he cast the spell on the ropes they tried ripping and cutting them but the ropes wouldn't break, then they knew that they were magical.

They traveled during the day so the sun would know they were coming, when the ground started to shrivel and dry they knew they were close, by the time they got there it was dark and the sun was in his hole, Maui said “my brothers build a wall with all of these stones around the pit” the brothers started to build the wall with the stones that were around the pit. When the sun started to rise Maui yelled to his brothers,”WHEN I SAY JUMP,JUMP AND HOOK THE SUN!” the brothers all nodded.

As the sun rose they all waited for Maui's command.”JUMP” said Maui, they all jumped and threw the ropes and they hooked up  the sun and they pulled with all of their might. Maui hit the sun on his nose harder and harder “are you trying to kill me” said the sun “NO, I AM MAKING YOU TIRED SO YOU WILL TAKE LONGER  FOR THE DAYS TO PASS” as soon as the sun was tired he told his brothers to let the ropes loose, as the sun floated slowly up in the air they knew they had slowed the sun.

Retold by Lily

My Mihi

Here is my mihi video.